October 28, 2005

Laird of Isle of Jura newsletter no.5

Laird of Jura newsletter no.5 Oct 05

Firstly, an apology for the lack of news letters over the summer. This has been down to several factors, including lack of time, reorganisation and plain old slackness on my part.  Sorry, I will do better!

Jura fell race 2005

Whitsun weekend at the end of May, 150 or so hardy souls embark on the annual Bens of Jura fell race. This involves running / scrambling over 7 mountain summits with a total vertical ascent of 7500 ft and covering a distance of approximately 16 miles. The course record is just over 3 hours. You may be thinking, “that’s only just over 5 miles an hour – I could walk it in 4 hours,” until you see the Paps and what they are made up of. (Paps, by the way, means breasts. Yes, there are 3 of them!) Sheer scree and boulders with boggy ground in between makes it one of the toughest fell races in the country. Unfortunately, this year the weather won the day. It was wet, windy, cold and the cloud base was low, so for safety’s sake the lower course, which misses out the Paps, had to be used. Five Jura runners completed the course and they took away the local challenge trophy which they compete for every year against the neighbouring island of Islay. Of course, come the morning after (and yet another good dance in the village hall) there were blue skies and bright sunshine. Several of the runners went round the full course just for the fun of it!

Doctor

The new doctor took up his post in May and he and his family seem to have settled well into island life. I hear he is a bit of a musician and will be performing at this year’s music festival.

Jura regatta

The annual regatta is held on the first Saturday in August. It is, and always has been, my favourite event in the Jura calendar and this year I managed a long weekend visit. It’s a busy weekend, but more so with “regular” visitors rather than the general hoards who descend for the fell race and the music festival. This, to me, makes it special as it gives you a chance to catch up with old friends and compete against old foes. The day was sunny and breezy and this year, for the sailing race, I managed to cobble together a boat using the mast and sails from a different one. My nephew and I finished 3rd (out of 5) so that wasn’t too bad. In the afternoon there is a raft race, which always produces great hilarity, followed by swimming races then rowing and canoe races. I managed a couple of firsts and a second (including showing the young upstarts that I could still paddle a canoe!) and Ardfarnal won the inter-township, the biggest and most competitive race of the day. The evening concert featuring the Wherries was a great success and the dance, featuring Skerryvore from Tiree, was hailed as the best of the summer. A long and happy day was ended at 5am watching the sun rise over Small Isles bay. Perfect!

The Lairds view

When I was on Jura in May, I cleared some of the bracken at the Lairds View. The bluebells were out, the sun was shining and I sat and admired the view for a while.

Bluebells at the Lairds View.

Next time, more photos from the Lairds View and another story about Jura. Slainthe David

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September 19, 2007

The Isle of Islay in 1775

The following article was taken from "A Journey to the Western Isles of Scotland" written by Samuel Johnson (1775). In order to preserve the original version as much as possible I have not altered any of the spelling differences you will see.

The Isle of Islay

The isle of Islay lies to the west of Jura, from which it is separated by a narrow channel; it is twenty four miles in length from south to north, and eighteen from east to west; there are some little mountains about the middle on the east side. The coast is for the most part heathy and uneven, and by consequence not proper for village; the north end is also full of heaths and hills. The south-west and west is pretty well cultivated, and there is six miles between Kilrow on the west, and Port Escock in the east, which is arable and well inhabited. There is about one thousand little hills on this road, and all abound with limestone; among which there is lately discovered a lead mine in three different places, but it has not turned to any account as yet. The corn growing here is barley and oats.

There is only one harbour in this isle, called Loch-Dale; it lies near the north end, and is of a great length and breadth; but the depth being in the middle, few vessels come within half a league of the land side.

There are several rivers in this isle affording salmon. The fresh-water lakes are well stocked with trouts; eels, and some with salmons: as Loch-Guirm, which is four miles in circumference, and hath several forts built on an island that lies in it.

Loch-Finlagan, about three miles in circumference, affords salmon, trouts, and eels: this lake lies in the centre of the isle. The isle Finlagan, from which this lake hath its name, is in it. It is famous for being once the court in which the great Macdonald, King of the Isles, had his residence; his houses, chapel, etc., are now ruinous. His guards de corps, called Lucht-taeh, kept guard on the lake side nearest to the isle; the walls of their houses are still to be seen there.

The High Court of Judicature, consisting of fourteen, sat always here; and there was an appeal to them from all the Courts in the isles: the eleventh share of the sum in debate was due to the principal judge. There was a big stone of seven feet square, in which there was a deep impression made to receive the feet of Macdonald; for he was crowned King of the Isles standing in this stone, and swore that he would continue his vassals in the possession of their lands, and do exact justice to all his subjects: and then his father’s sword was put into his hand. The Bishop of Argyll and seven priests anointed him king, in presence of all the heads of the tribes in the isles and continent, and were his vassals; at which time the orator rehearsed a catalogue of his ancestors, etc.

There are several forts built in the isles that are in fresh-water lakes, as in Ilan-Loch-Guirn, and Ilan-Viceain; there is a fort called Dunnivag in the south-west side of the isle, and there are several caves in different places of it. The largest that I saw was in the north end, and is called Vah-Vearnag; it will contain 200 men to stand or sit in it. There is a kill for drying corn made on the east side of it; and on the other side there is a wall built close to the side of the cave, which was used for a bed-chamber; it had a fire on the floor, and some chairs about it, and the bed stood close to the wall. There is a stone without the cave door, about which the common people make a tour sunways.

A mile on the south-west side of the cave is the celebrated well called Toubir in Knahar, which in the ancient language is as much as to say, the well that sallied from one place to another: for it is a received tradition among the vulgar inhabitants of this isle, and the opposite isle of Colonsay, that this well was first in Colonsay, until an imprudent woman happened to wash her hands in it, and that immediately after, the well being thus abused, came in an instant to Islay, where it is like to continue, and is ever since esteemed a catholicon for diseases by the natives and adjacent islanders; and the great resort to it is commonly every quarter-day.

It is common with sick people to make a vow to come to the well, and after drinking, they make a tour sunways round it, and then leave an offering of some small token, such as a pin, needle, farthing, or the like, on the stone cover which is above the well. But if the patient is not like to recover, they send a proxy to the well, who acts as above-mentioned, and carries home some of the water to be drank by the sick person.

There is a little chapel beside this well, to which such as had found the benefit of the water, came back and returned thanks to God for their recovery.

There are several rivers on each side this isle that afford salmon. I was told by the natives that the Brion of Islay, a famous judge, is according to his own desire, buried standing on the brink of the river Laggan, having in his right hand a spear, such as they use to dart at the salmon.

There are some isles on the coast of this island, as island Texa on the south-west, about a mile in circumference; and island Ouirsa, a mile likewise in circumference, with the small isle called Nave.

The Names of the Churches in this Isle are as follows: Kil-Chollim Kill, St. Columbus his church near Port Escock, Kil-Chovan in the Rins, on the west side the isle; Kil-Chiaran in Rins, on the west side Nerbols in the Rins, St. Columbus his church in Laggan, a chapel in island Nave, and Kilhan Alen, north-west of Kilrow. There is a cross standing near St. Columbus’s or Port Escock side, which is ten feet high. There are two stones set up at the east side of Loch-Finlagan, and they are six feet high.

All the inhabitants are Protestants; some among them observe the festivals of Christmas and Good Friday. They are well proportioned and indifferently healthful.

The air here is not near so good as that of Jura, from which it is but a short mile distant; but Islay is lower and more marshy, which makes it liable to several diseases that do not trouble those of Jura. They generally speak the Irish tongue; all those of the best rank speak English; they use the same habit and diet with those of Jura.

This isle is annexed to the Crown of Scotland. Sir Hugh Campbell of Caddell is the King’s steward there, and has one half of the island. This isle is reckoned the furthest west of all the isles in Britain. There is a village on the west coast of it called Cul, i.e., the back part; and the natives say it was so called because the ancients thought it the back of the world, as being the remotest part on that side of it. The natives of Islay, Colonsay, and Jura say that there is an island lying to the southwest of these isles, about the distance of a day’s sailing, for which they have only a bare tradition. Mr. MacSwen, present minister in the isle Jura, gave me the following account of it, which he had from the master of an English vessel that happened to anchor at that little isle, and came afterwards to Jura, which is thus:

As I was sailing some thirty leagues to the southwest of Islay, I was becalmed near a little isle, where I dropped anchor and went ashore. I found it covered all over with long grass. There was abundance of seals lying on the rocks and on the shore; there is likewise a multitude of sea-fowls in it; there is a river in the middle, and on each side of it I found great heaps of fish bones of many sorts; there are many planks and boards cast up upon the coast of the isle, and it being all plain, and almost level with the sea, I caused my men (being then idle) to erect a heap of the wood about two stories high; and that with a design to make the island more conspicuous to seafaring men.

This isle is four English miles in length, and one in breadth. I was about thirteen hours sailing between this isle and Jura. Mr. John MacSwen, above mentioned, having gone to the isle of Colonsay some few days after, was told by the inhabitants that from an eminence near the monastery in a fair day they saw as it were the top of a little mountain in the south-west sea, and that they doubted not but it was land, though they never observed it before. Mr. MacSwen was confirmed in this opinion by the account above-mentioned; but when summer was over, they never saw this little hill, as they called it, any more; the reason which is supposed to be this, that the high winds in all probability has cast down the pile of wood that forty seamen had erected the preceding year in that island, which, by reason of the description above recited, we may aptly enough call the Green Island.

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September 18, 2007

The Isle of Jura in the Past

The following article was taken from "A Journey to the Western Isles of Scotland" written by Samuel Johnson in 1775. In order to preserve the original version as much as possible I have not altered any of the spelling differences you will see.

The isle of Jura is by a narrow channel of about half a mile broad separated from Islay. The natives say that Jura is so called from Dih and Rah, two brethren, who are believed to have been Danes, the names Dih and Rah signifying as much as without grace or prosperity. Tradition says that these two brethren fought and killed one another in the village Knock-Cronm, where there are two stones erected of 7 feet high each, and under them, they say, there are urns, with the ashes of the two brothers; the distance between them is about 60 yards. The isle is mountainous along the middle, where there are four hills of a considerable height. The two highest are well known to sea-faring men by the name of the Paps of Jura. They are very conspicuous from all quarters of sea and land in those parts.

This isle is twenty-four miles long, and in some places six or seven miles in breadth. It is the Duke of Argyll’s property, and part of the Sheriffdom of Argyll.

The mould is brown and greyish on the coast, and black in the hills, which are covered with heath and some grass that proves good pasturage for their cattle, which are horses, cows, sheep, and goats. There is variety of land and water-fowl here. The hills ordinarily have about three hundred deer grazing on them, which are not to be hunted by any without the steward’s license. This isle is perhaps the wholesomest plot of ground either in the isles or continent of Scotland, as appears by the long life of the natives and their state of health, to which the height of the hills is believed to contribute in a large measure, by the fresh breezes of wind that come from them to purify the air; whereas Islay and Gigha, on each side this isle, are much lower, and are not so wholesome by far, being liable to several diseases that are not here. The inhabitants observe that the air of this place is perfectly pure, from the middle of March till the end or middle of September. There is no epidemical disease that prevails here. Fevers are but seldom observed by the natives, and any kind of flux is rare. The gout and agues are not so much as known by them, neither are they liable to sciatica. Convulsions, vapours, palsies, surfeits, lethargies, megrims, consumptions, rickets, pains of the stomach, or coughs, are not frequent here, and none of them are at any time observed to become mad. I was told by several of the natives that there was not one woman died of childbearing there these 34 years past. Bloodletting and purging are not used here.

If any contract a cough, they use brochan only to remove it. If after a fever one chance to be taken ill of a stitch, they take a quantity of ladywrack, and half as much of red-fog, and boil them in water. The patients sit upon the vessel, and receive the fume, which by experience they find effectual against this distemper. Fevers and the diarrhœas are found here only when the air is foggy and warm, in winter or summer.

The inhabitants for their diet make use of beef and mutton in the winter and spring, as also of fish, butter, cheese, and milk. The vulgar take brochan frequently for their diet during the winter and spring; and brochan and bread used for the space of two days restores lost appetite.

The women of all ranks eat a lesser quantity of food than the men. This and their not wearing anything strait about them is believed to contribute much to the health of both the mothers and children.

There are several fountains of excellent water in this isle. The most celebrated of them is that of the mountain Beinbrek in the Tarbat, called Toubir ni Lechkin, that is, the well in a stony descent. It runs easterly, and they commonly reckon it to be lighter by one half than any other water in this isle; for though one drink a great quantity of it at a time, the belly is not swelled, or any ways burdened by it. Natives and strangers find it efficacious against nauseousness of the stomach and the stone. The river Nissa receives all the water that issues from this well, and this is the reason they give why salmon here are in goodness and taste far above those of any other river whatever. The river of Crockbreck affords salmon also, but they are not esteemed so good as those of the river Nissa.





Several of the natives have lived to a great age. I was told that one of them, called Gillouir MacCrain, lived to have kept one hundred and eighty Christmasses in his own house. He died about fifty years ago, and there are several of his acquaintances living to this day, from whom I had this account.

Bailiff Campbell lived to the age of one hundred and six years; he died three years ago; he passed the thirty-three last years before his death in this isle. Donald MacNamill, who lives in the village of Killearn at present, is arrived at the age of ninety years.

A woman of the Isle of Scarba, near the north end of this isle, lived seven score years, and enjoyed the free use of her senses and understanding all her days; it is now two years since she died.

There is a large cave, called King’s Cave on the west side of the Tarbat, near the sea; there is a well at the entry which renders it the more convenient for such as may have occasion to lodge in it.

About two miles further from the Tarbat, there is a cave at Corpich which hath an altar in it; there are many small pieces of petrified substance hanging from the roof of this cave.

There is a place where vessels used to anchor on the west side of this island, called Whitfarlan, about 100 yards north from the porter’s house.

About four leagues south from the north end of this isle, lies the bay Da’l Yaul, which is about half a mile in length; there is a rock on the north side of the entry, which they say is five fathom deep, and but three fathom within.

About a league further to the south, on the same coast, lies the small isles of Jura, within which there is a good anchoring-place; the south entry is the best: island Nin Gowir must be kept on the left hand; it is easily distinguished by its bigness from the rest of the isles. Conney Isle lies to the north of this island. There are black and white spotted serpents in this isle; their head being applied to the wound, is by the natives used as the best remedy for their poison. Within a mile of the Tarbat there is a stone erected about eight feet high. Loch-Tarbat on the west side runs easterly for about five miles, but is not a harbour for vessels, or lesser boats, for it is altogether rocky.

The shore on the west side affords coral and coralline. There is a sort of dulse growing on this coast, of a white colour.

Between the north end of Jura, and the isle Scarba, lies the famous and dangerous gulf, called Cory Vrekan, about a mile in breadth; it yields an impetuous current, not to be matched anywhere about the isle of Britain. The sea begins to boil and ferment with the tide of flood, and resembles the boiling of a pot; and then increases gradually, until it appears in many whirlpools, which form themselves in sort of pyramids, and immediately after spout up as high as the mast of a little vessel, and at the same time make a loud report. These white waves run two leagues with the wind before they break; the sea continues to repeat these various motions from the beginning of the tide of flood, until it is more than half-flood, and then it decreases gradually until it hath ebbed about half an hour, and continues to boil till it is within an hour of low water. This boiling of the sea is not above a pistol-shot distant from the coast of Scarba Isle, where the white waves meet and spout up: they call it the Kaillach, i.e., an old hag; and they say that when she puts on her kerchief, i.e., the whitest waves, it is then reckoned fatal to approach her. Notwithstanding this great ferment of the sea, which brings up the least shell from the ground, the smallest fisher-boat may venture to cross this gulf at the last hour of the tide of flood, and at the last hour of the tide of ebb.

This gulf hath its name from Brekan, said to be son to the King of Denmark, who was drowned here, cast ashore in the north of Jura, and buried in a cave, as appears from the stone, tomb, and altar there.

The natives told me that about three years ago an English vessel happened inadvertently to pass through this gulf at the time when the sea began to boil; the whiteness of the waves, and their spouting up, was like the breaking of the sea upon a rock; they found themselves attracted irresistibly to the white rock, as they then supposed it to be: this quickly obliged them to consult their safety, and so they betook themselves to the small boat with all speed, and thought it no small happiness to land safe in Jura, committing the vessel under all her sails to the uncertain conduct of tide and wind. She was driven to the opposite continent of Knapdale, where she was no sooner arrived than the tide and wind became contrary to one another, and so the vessel was cast into a creek, where she was safe; and then the master and crew were, by the natives of this isle, conducted to her, where they found her as safe as they left her, though all her sails were still hoisted.

The natives gave me an account, that some years ago a vessel had brought some rats hither, which increased so much that they became very uneasy to the people, but on a sudden they all vanished; and now there is not one of them in the isle.

There is a church here called Ilillearn, the inhabitants are all Protestants, and observe the festivals of Christmas, Easter, and Michaelmas; they do not open a grave on Friday, and bury none on that day, except the grave has been opened before.

The natives here are very well proportioned, being generally black of complexion and free from bodily imperfections. They speak the Irish language, and wear the plaid, bonnet, etc., as other islanders.

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December 27, 2006

“Discover some of the best Scottish Humour jokes on the net.”

Scottish humour (or humor if you are from the USA) is said to a very dry humour and often seen as putting down our nation and our own people.

For example one of the most common jokes in Scottish humour is about the meanness or frugality of Scots people. For example we still love to joke that we are tight fisted.

Advert in local newspaper.  For Sale Used Gravestone ideal for family named McDonald.

After a rather poor collection was gathered in, the church minister prayed, "We thank you , dear Lord, that the collection plate has been returned safely"

In reality research figures over many years have consistently shown that per head of population we give far more to charity than our English counterparts.

Many of us — including myself — love to hear the bagpipes when they are played well but with our Scottish humor we can joke about the sound they make to untrained ears that have no taste.

Wee Sandy had just moved to London.  Visited by a friend from Scotland he was asked how he was doing.

"Weel",he said, "its jist grand, apart from the English Neighbours. The lot next door scream and shout and doonstairs is forever knocking up wi a broom".

"For goodness sake, Sandy, How do you stand all this commotion?"asked his friend.

"Och,ah jist keep quietly practicing on ma pipes!"

A lot of Scottish humour includes jokes about our national drink (Scotch Whisky) often with a well deserved put down for other drinks that pretend to be our whisky.

For example three CEO’s of large whisky companies went into a hotel bar.

"Okay barman ", said the first one, "give me a Japanese Whisky, the finest whisky in the world." The Barman gives him his drink.

"Right barman," said the second CEO, Give me a large American Whiskey, the finest whisky in the world."  The Barman gives him his drink.

"Right barman," said the Scottish CEO. "Give me a coke"

The other two Whisky CEOs were astonished and asked " Why aren’t you drinking Scotch whisky?"

"Well", said the Scot, " I reckoned if you guys aren’t drinking whisky, neither would I"

 

We also love to to use our particular brand of Scottish humor to have a go at our politicians.

99.9% of Scots are decent, hardworking, law abiding and and honest citizens.  But we still have to learn to accept the blame for electing the other 0.1% to govern us.

But maybe more than anything the Scottish Humor tends to love to have a joke about our English neighbours south of the border.

When God created Scotland, He looked down on it with great satisfaction. Finally He called the Archangel Gabriel to have a look.

“Just see,” said God. “This is the best yet. Splendid mountains, beautiful scenery, brave men, the very finest of all women, nice cool weather. And I’ve given them beautiful music and a special drink called whisky. Try some.”

Gabriel took an appreciative sip.

“Excellent,” he said. “But haven’t you perhaps been too kind to them? Won’t they be spoiled by all these things? Should there not be some drawback?”

“Just wait till you see the neighbours they’re getting,” said God.

We will be adding large numbers of pages of Scottish humor jokes to this website over the next few months. Come back and see them regularly.

Alternatively contribute your own Scottish Humour to our pages below

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October 25, 2004

Laird of Isle of Jura Newsletter 1

Isle of Jura newsletter October 2004

Welcome to your Isle of Jura newsletter. In this issue I am bringing you news of the Isle of Jura Music festival, Isle of Jura 365 : The Landscape Photographic Exhibition, and a poem on Farewell to Jura written in 1871.

Isle of Jura Music Festival 2004

The annual Isle of Jura music festival took place on the last weekend in September. This is now arguably the biggest event in the Jura calendar, attracting visitor numbers that more than double the population for the weekend.

This is no doubt due to the musical talent on display - ranging from the “locals” concert on the Friday night through to the main concert and dance on the Saturday, the numerous sessions, pipers, fiddlers, Gaelic singers, a jazz band, a bit of Irish/country and western and even a samba band (that managed to collapse the stage in the field!) At one point on Saturday night this author counted no fewer than 5 different places to go to hear music. Not bad for a wee island like Jura!

This year’s headline act at the main concert on Saturday night was the Michael McGoldrick Band. Supported by accomplished musicians there ain’t nothing Michael can’t do with a flute. Brilliant!

Meanwhile, up in the hotel bar the Gillespie brothers had them dancing on the tables with their pipes and accordion. Then it was the Jimmy Shandrix Experince that had us dancing in the hall until 3 am!

A few sore heads on the Sunday but it was on with the show! The Islay Pipe Band, the Jazz band (who also played in the church), singers and Gaorsach with their dancing display. Finally, the children put on a play with masks and shadow puppets in which Buie the Dwarf put paid to the wicked witch of Beinn an Oir (one of the Paps).

The bar remained packed for the rest of the night with a few game musicians battling on, but most of us by this time were partied out!

If you are interested in coming to Isle of Jura for the festival, it is held over the last weekend in September (a traditional Glasgow holiday weekend).

Accommodation books up very early but camping is available in the field in front of the Jura hotel. Please be warned, the place can be very busy.

Isle of Jura 365 : The Landscape Photographic Exhibition

A 3 year photographic project, carried out on Jura by Dr Gary Mckay from the USA, captured some 46,000 raw images in every season. The focus of the project was to interpret Gaelic place names within the landscape, and to capture them according to their translations. A selection of these images will be displayed at various locations on Jura, Islay and the mainland over the coming months. Go to www.theisleofjura.co.uk for further information on the exhibition and the island.

Isle of Jura Stories from the past

This month a poem, written by Jessie Scott on Feb 27th 1871 of Knockintavill (Barnhill). It is believed it was written just before she left for America knowing she would not be coming back to the Isle of Jura.

Farewell to Jura

No more I’ll climb the mountains high
To view the meeting sea and eye.
The stately vessels passing by
On every side of Jura.

Give honour to the great the brave,
To sordid souls the gold they crave,
Give me a walk at dusky eve
Along the shores of Jura.

How dear to me thy every scene,
When sun shines o’er the Western Main,
Or when he walks and spreads again
His golden beams o’er Jura.

By simple nature’s power impressed
There friendship glows in every breast
The stranger is a welcome guest
At every hearth in Jura.

From strife of noisy towns secure,
There mortals spend their lives obscure,
And long may harmony endure
Throughout the Isle of Jura.

Though ne’er to tread thy shores again,
My heart with thee shall aye remain
Where’er I wander I’ll retain
My dearest wish for Jura

Until next month, slainte. David

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